Owning your choice

Very often, I made decision and didn't get the value as I wanted.  I started to regret the decision I made and start to blame myself and the person involved in the decision.
I wonder what's the real issue here and who is the one should take responsibility.
Sometimes,  since we already sit in the restaurant,  even though, it's expensive, but shame to move; friend is asking to eat in a pricy restaurant and it's my turn to pay,but too shameful to say no; friend ask me to buy coffee for her but didn't have intention to pay me back, I am not happy,but shamful to ask little money; paid for a friend to register a dinner party,but 3 months later, still not pay me back,but can't ask her to pay back .  It's all around money. Because I do have a belief and value on where I should spend my money. . But why lie ,and why shamful. It's personal image issue.  need to improve!

ANGER TOWARDS FAKE FRIENDS

I have a lot of friends like this. They are actually just people I know. I like to share things in a personal level, I want to tell you what's going in my mind, what s happened with so and so. How I feel and What I did. But the answer always : oh right; great ; can I check and get back to you; please check government to get help: do you want to consult someone?
I never get any personal or valuable opinions towards my question, there is always a vague answer and I just don't see people 's heart  and true being. Is it my problem or other people's problem? Am I being blunt to ask true heart friendship and feedback or people need to be on a "haha, lovely, great" type of friendship. If you have an opinion, please say right way, if you like it, please show truly your gratitude. If you don't like it, please tell me. Tell the truth and be honest please!

PRIDE? PROUD ? OR PRUDE?

Today I had a very interesting trigger. One French girl work with troy ask to have an interview with me. I thought in French, interview means rendez-vous. She might mean to have an appointment, but it is officially an interview. The funny thing is she skyped me with flurry quality, I hardly hear her. She puts on an official face and start to ask a lot of typical questions like:  Where do you like about children? what can you bring to children? What is your advantages?...I answered but start to get angry inside. One year ago, Alyson murry asked me the same questions, I carefully answered with gratitude. Alyson , as an ESP coach, 9 years MDS has more than enough credit to interview me and I had never work with baby before. And that interview would potentially lead to an 4500 dollars job monthly. However, this year, the same scenario, also Skype, I felt so annoyed. She is a nanny or baby sitter; broken English;Skype me when she can actually meet me for coffee, what would have been more professional and I might have more experience than her, I worked with 3 age group and my performance is so great in Miami.  Yes, my anger is Who are you to interview me like this?
She asked some privacy questions like my past salary, I intend to share more rainbow stuff to show off that I am more MDS than you. Then she ends up refuse to tell me the family name?  What the F? I shared my absolutely privacy, and you don't even want to tell me a name? I get so pissed . But I know it is totally my status issue still barking me up. If when I start to do something new, I tried to do a great job, some one else judged my performance , because they think they are higher up. The truth is that it is very possible for the family to let their very trusted nanny to interview people, and she even wrote the whole question set to do her job.  I really should understand this, not to having a bit issue with my ego.